Get Out The Way, Let Casper Drive.

For those of you that haven't seen this groundbreaking video (that coincidentally stole my Fantasy Football League name) , I have attached the video below:



Not only did this video make me laugh, but it provided an assignment to follow the Highly Successful Webcam Invasion.

There is a car that parks at my office building daily that looks quite a bit like the one in the video above. I photographed the vehicle to verify that the car in question matches Grandma's car. We determined based on model, color, sticker location, and the presence of an EZ Tag, that there's about a 95% certainty that this is the same car.

It appears grandma is a late sleeper though as she arrives well after I get to work at 8:00...well ok, 8:07... She does not arrive during the 8 o clock hour.

I've estimated that her lunchtime begins somewhere between 12:45 and 1:00 which does not mesh with mine.

She also seems to be a hard worker as she's doesn't leave before 6:00.

With all of her scheduling working against me, I still managed to catch her yellow car rolling out of my parking lot one afternoon when Penny was taking me to pick my car up from getting maintanance. I requested she scrap the trip to Honda and tail the car. Our 95% certainty was boosted 4 points when I got a visual of the driver. It turns out the driver isn't Grandma, rather Grandpa was driving the vehicle. I wanted to follow Grandpa to lunch and confront him there. So we continued to follow him down the road. 10 miles later, we realized that we were heading out of town and I determined showing up at the man's house was the stalker line that I didn't want to cross.

So as for now, I have still been unable to contact the Ghostriding Geezers. However, I'm working on it. I will talk to Grandpa and I'll gain his trust. And then we'll ghostride.

Normal Times

Sorry it's been so long since I last posted. I had to iron out some details with the U2 contract.

I guess everything is finally normal here in Conroe. Penny finally lives down the parking lot from me and therefore I have spent some leisure time in the city I live in. As much as I've enjoyed that, I can't wait to get back to CS for Football/Soccer Season. Now if only the 12th Man Foundation would send my season tickets to my address rather than Montgomery...

I bet you're North of here.

I spent my week in Brownsville, try to get more South in Texas than that. I dare you.

I arrived in town Monday and learned one thing very quickly. The folks in Brownsville do not do any work. Training them was like pulling teeth in the beginning. No one knew their job responsibilities, even the supervisors. Wednesday, the jail infirmary was practically shut down until 10:30. Cowboys tickets went on sale at 10:00, so until then phones weren’t to be used and computers weren’t to be touched. Luckily the tickets to the Cowboys – Vikings game were secured…

The day progressed better than expected, which leads me to my current setting. I figured I was done with the task I’d been assigned, so I got a flight out a day early. A 6:40PM flight was doable, so I booked the flight and arrived to Valley International Airport in Harlingen at 5:50. The flight was delayed however. And again. And again. And now we’re set to depart at 9:00PM.

So I’m sitting in the airport restaurant along with everyone else waiting for a flight. Lucky for me there are 25 credits on the jukebox I’m next to. 22 remain now as I select Dead & Bloated to follow up my selections of 3AM and I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For. No one’s objected yet, so I imagine I’ll keep playing DJ for the already irritated patrons. Maybe I should throw on some Selena to please the crowd.

It turns out that Brownsville isn’t so bad, immensely better than Laredo. We went to Progresso on Monday, which I’d been to before, but it was a good trip. Got some goods. I have my laptop case and a clay pot with me as carryons. That’s South Texas business man right there.

A fellow patron just noticed that our flight had been pushed back to the current time of 9:00PM. Needless to say, he’s not thrilled. The lady on tv is showing me that Dallas is currently getting pounded and the Departure Screen just announced that the 5:40 flight to Dallas has been pushed further back to 9:25… It’s days like this that I count myself lucky to not work at the airport dealing with the angry people, it doesn’t help the fact that I’m still stuck in this airport for another couple of hours though.

My ringtone is now playing on the Jukebox; Blaze of Glory by Bon Jovi.

Busy weekends to come! This weekend I will be going to Corpus to get my long lost cat. The next weekend, I will be helping Penny move (one of the many moving that weekend). And soon after it’s Soccer and Football season. Can’t wait to get back to Aggieland for that. It should be a good season.

I’ve been out of the office all week which means I have things to catch up with other than my blog. Things such as TexAgs and Pearls Before Swine comics from this week. And Desperado will play as I close this entry. This music is much better than the crying children. I hope they're not waiting for my flight.

Out of Place

Let me ask you a question (and that "you" is singular, not plural because I'm sure that no more than 1 person reads my blog (side note: is it just me or does "singular" look wrong everytime I type it because of that little orange man's company...? (triple parenthesis, cool!))). My question is, "Have you ever been the only minority in an entire city?" Well I have.

My adventures took me to Laredo this week (better known to my family as "The border town where everyone gets killed or kidnapped"-ville). I did some training and galavanted around the town. They had an impressive mall (impressive in its size and number of businesses) and an impressive HEB (impressive in it's ghetto-ness and the fact that everyone shopping there was pregnant). But most notable was the fact that I was the only caucasian there. Imagine how out of place I felt. Especially since I was wearing a Texas A&M shirt (everyone in the valley wears burnt orange). The only thing that would have made me stick out more would be if I had brought along my Washington Redskins cap (Cowboys' rival) and my "Catholics stink!" banner (everyone knows that all of South Texas is Catholic).

Ok, so I don't own a Washington Redskins cap or any anti-Catholic propoganda, but nonetheless...

This lack of diversity wasn't the only thing apparent. Also quite noticeable was how wretchedly boring the town is. I mean other than the mall, watching hobos fight over a matress on the access road (true), and the dog fights downtown (probably true), there's absolutely nothing to do in the town. I realized how boring this city was last time I visited, but being on my own, the realization punched me in the face as I looked out my scenic overview of the junkyard from my 3rd floor hotel window.

So as I ate at Taco Palenque, I decided that Laredo needs the help of a marketing major to attach a tagline to their city.

Laredo - As fun as bubblewrap...but somebody's already popped all the bubbles. And stole your wallet.

Laredo - Come for the cheap pottery! Stay until someone pays your ransom.

Laredo - 180 degrees from ordinary. And 180 degrees hotter.


Hmmm...I'm still working on them. At least I'm putting my degree to use.

Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs

There are certain signs you would think wouldn't need to be posted in public places. Especially in County Courthouses. Check the following lineup of signs from Eastland County Courthouse.

Fatty Row

I thought the Fatty Special was perfected when I was in Lubbock. Taco Bueno and Krispy Kreme both near my hotel. It made for a nice dinner. But here I am in Longview. Kudos Mr. City Planner, you are a genius. Just across the street from my hotel, there is a Taco Bueno, Shake's Frozen Custard and a Whataburger side by side. So of course for dinner I had the Fatty Special #2, some Chiladas from Taco Bueno and a Mint Oreo Concrete from Shake's. Perfection.

Coming Soon

So if you don't know already. Something major is happening in my life. It's in progress right now. Right down the road. A small oddly shaped building is being constructed 5 minutes from here. The sign in front of this structure is warning Lenny's "Taco Bueno coming soon." Sorry Lenny's, I have a new dining destination.

Special K Vanilla Almond rules the cereal world. Princess Cereal, you know I still love you.

Everyone's all graduated and grown up. Congrats to the grads. Way to go on graduating, but thanks a lot for moving away... Karen will still be holding down CS. And her graduation party rocked the Farm.

Not a lot else is going on. BUSY BUSY at work. Annabelle is running around the house and Clinton is calling.

I got the news playing while I blog and a top story from Downtown Houston: A man has been given a restraining order after he stuffed his girlfriend in the dryer. Way to go dude, creativity counts.

My Town

So I live in this town of Conroe in between my weekend trips to College Station. I still have trouble considering myself a resident. Maybe one day I will hang out here enough to call it home. But for now I just hang out here with my cat. On second thought, my coworkers don't even live in this city. Maybe it's time I move out...

Down by the River

Alright kid-aroos, here I am! We're holding our annual conference for our clients. This year it's in the grand city of San Antonio. So far it's been great! Our clients are some cool people. I'm getting a break before our dinner party. We'll be down the road in the party room with some band my boss likes and some Boudro's catered food (excellent restraunt). Then we'll have to keep up with these ladies all night (small survey says that at least one ends up falling in the river tonight).

I had to get a loaner phone because my screen went out. I could call and recieve calls, but I wouldnt know who I was calling or who was calling me and I couldn't dial because my key pad is on the touch-screen. So now I'm stuck with this ghetto loaner that has about 5 names entered into it (aside from Jose, Mari, and others that were left in the phone from the previous user) until I get the replacement. I have to return the loaner to the SA store. So I'll either drop it off on the other side of town before we leave tomorrow or mail it back. Bet on the latter.

Technology has been revolting all day. Perfect timing... Computers, phones, speakers....

And finally, shout out to Nick and a little bragging to rub it in his face. At this hotel, everyday is Popcorn Friday!

Mail Call!

Check out the trouble I stir up by calling Clinton out!

http://www.thebatt.com/home/index.cfm?event=displayArticleComments&ustory_id=0a68b91d-fd27-4f91-8f27-4270a8905715#b53f56b2-3719-4eb2-b7b3-1cfdd63172e1

Sights and Sounds

I apologize; I haven’t kept up with this blog. And with all of my excuses of being too busy, I’m sorry to say that I’ve been in Conroe for most of the past couple of weeks. But now I’m back out on site. This time I’m sitting in Cameron, TX, a short hour drive from CS where I’m staying.

Other then enjoying my time in the city I live in and my weekly trips to CS, I haven’t been doing a whole lot. I made the trip to SA to see the Elite Eight (wish my Ags would have been in it). I vacuumed my apartment for the first time and was able to buy groceries that I stayed around long enough to eat.

As I told a couple of people, I hate the Wal-Mart in Conroe. It is the most unhappy, wretched place in the nation. I would much rather do my shopping in the friendly Wal-Marts located in Montgomery or The Woodlands. What keeps me coming back however, is the sheer curiosity of what I may encounter this time. Well I made a list last week of the sights I encountered. Allow me to summarize it:

1. And old lady having an old lady conversation on the phone by the milk. It went a little something like this, “What’s that you say? Hold on, this darned hearing aid’s going out…. Ok, now what? No…Wal-Mart. No, Wal-Mart! Wal…Wal-Mart! I said I’m at Wal-Mart!’
2. A man wearing Chef clothes over his Wal-Mart uniform, standing by the lobster tank repeatedly poking the lobsters with his finger.
3. A lady that I accidentally startled by walking past her. “Oh goodness!” she said as she grabbed her heart. Sorry lady, didn’t realize I would scare you by walking past you in a crowded grocery store. There are others around I hope you know… I’ll pick up some Anxiety Medicine for you when I head back to the pharmacy.
4. A cashier that checked me out without ever really making eye contact with me or speaking to me. She did however scream/sing, “I Ain’t Going To Heaven When I Die!” as I approached. And then holler out behind me “WOOOO! It’s the buggy patrol!” as I walked out with my shopping cart.
5. The guy in charge of corralling shopping carts was hanging from the tree while sporting his orange vest.

Strange place. Stay away.

That’s all I got for you. I’ll be spending the week until Wednesday afternoon somewhere between Cameron and College Station. Feels like home. Lots of people are missing though. If y’all have to move away from College Station, the least you could do is come to Conroe. I can still get you that job at Lenny’s Deli if anyone’s interested…

Alice Por Vida

Due to some technical difficulties on the side of the county, I'm not leaving tomorrow at lunch as was scheduled. The fact of the matter is, I'll probably be here until the end of the day on Friday at least... Well, at least I have home cooking and familiar faces to come back to. I'll enjoy this time with my family. Commuting to Alice each morning isn't a great thrill though. On the way there this morning I remember one thing I didn't like about this place (other than the mosquito population) and that is the fog. Heavy fog slowed traffic to below 50 on the highway this morning. Made a long, boring morning commute even longer...

Other things that made the day awkward included: 1. Chris having the great idea of bringing Pigs in Blankets to the clients for breakfast. (Better read as: Chris bringing the Catholics meat for breakfast on Ash Wednesday). 2. Having the county judge start a conversation with me from a stall in the bathroom. 3. Telling the IT guy "Nice to meet you," and him replying, "Hey, we went to Calallen, I already know you." My bad on all 3 counts.

Around Texas

I've been cruisin all over the place. The next month doesn't show any signs of slowing that pace down. A few notes from my journeys:

1. The new Drury in San Antonio is gonna be awesome. We got a tour a few weeks ago before it was open and it is top notch. The rooftop pool overlooking downtown SA is definately the coolest amenity. It's in the old Alamo Bank building and promises to be the nicest hotel on the Riverwalk.

2. Boerne's a pretty happening place. The Hungry Horse Grill is excellent. Best Chicken Fried Steak I've had and fresh veggies. This happened the day I got there, pretty funny story. There are some cute little shops downtown including a Native American store that sells "Herbal Smokes" which are an "Alternative, non-tobacco smoking mix." Peyote? This shop was next door:














Which was good because whenever I go shopping for old stuff, I always crave a pickle. Way to go shopkeeper.


3. West Columbia is all I thought it would be. No worse, no better. It was good to go home with Penny this weekend because a. I got to spend all weekend with her. b. I'd never been to her hometown and she's been to CC like 45 times.

4. I love our BBall team, the Aggies are tearing it up so far in all the Spring Sports.

5. I'll be going to Corpus tomorrow, have a few days of work to do in Alice. That means Annabelle will get to accompany me on her first business trip because we're staying in the Wilson Inn. And even though I havent left for Corpus yet, I'll already know what hotspots I'll hit. Bring on the Fermins.

Secret Agent Man

On my Google homepage, a random webcam from somewhere on the Globe is displayed. Every 15 seconds, this camera changes. One day, I noticed a camera marked "Bryan, TX" on the homepage. The link is: http://128.194.244.10/top/liveapplet.html.

The mission was to find where in Bryan this place was and what it was used for. Surveillance was done by the CWSquared Agency. It was learned that these people worked 12 hour days and were most likely a terrorist organization. After a few weeks and a couple of leads, the camera's location was determined and the Agents were deployed a few weeks later. Their mission was to infiltrate the facility and let them know we are watching them. The mission began at 12:30 AM and was captured on camera:

The agents meet and converge on the target. They are notified from homebase that one enemy remains in the facility.













The agents enter the building through the strategic entrance located on the same wall as the present enemy's office.















The webcam catches the 4 entering the facility. They cautiously step in, making sure the enemy down the hall doesn't hear them.
















They proceed down the hall with stealth, stopping to make sure their entrance wasn't noticed.

















Sign (Warning) 1 of 3 is posted just down the hall from the office in which the enemy was working.













2 Agents proceed to the upstairs deck to post another warning and to survey the situation.
















The other 2 agents remain grounded on the main floor. Just down the hall, the light from the enemy's office may be seen. Soon after this picture is taken, the agents on the floor rushed out and hid beside the building as the enemy emerged from his office. The 2 located upstairs dropped to the floor and hid behind the flags as the man made his rounds, turned off the lights, and locked the building up.
















The 2 agents inside were notified that the coast was clear and returned to the main floor to let the other 2 back into the now-vacant building.
















They then climbed the ladder to the walkway that extends around half of the building and the 3rd sign was deployed. It can be seen near the top of the screen in the middle. You can see it zoomed in below.
















The sign features a picture taken weeks earlier by the web cam of one of the enemies picking his nose. It includes the reminder "Hey new guy - Employees must wash hands."















The agents then proceeded back down the ladder and out the back exit.















The heads of CWSquared and brains behind the operation mount the facility's sign for a victory picture. Mission Accomplished.

Progressive Reunion.

I wrote about half of nice, long entry here at terminal B75 in IAH. A lady across the room has a Very noisy, squeeky sounding dog. After 30 minutes, the dog had gotten on my nerves. So I set my phone on the chair beside me to get some headphones from my bag, as I then reached to unzip my notebook case, my phone slid off it's resting place and hit the floor without too much sound. As it hit, the battery cover shot off along with the battery. And that was the end of that entry. So now, I begin at square one, but this time with a new opening paragraph.

The ladies will be happy to know that the woman next to me is reading 'The Wedding.' The guys will be happy to know that I don't remember if that's the sequal or the prequal to 'The Notebook.' The lady on the other side of me is reading a magazine featuring scantly clad Hispanuc people. Neither of these ladies were next to me when I began my original entry. Let's get back to that.

I'm waiting patiently to board my flight to Midland. I'll be spending a couple of nights there, doing business in Seminole. I've never visited either of these citis, but with the affection I have for West Texas, my expectations are fairly low.

So that's where I'm going. Now where have I been? A couple of weeks ago, after spending a couple of days in Laredo, I determined that it was a terrible city to visit (right up there with Kerrville). Krispy Kreme and a pretty decent authentic Mexican food place called Palenque Grill are among its very limited redeeming features. Last week I spent a night in Waco, got to visit the new Taco Bueno, and ate my Chiladas with my bare hands (they forgot to give me silverware). I hope the towel washer at the Fairfield Inn was able to get the Chilada stains out of the towels that night. The next day I made stops in Coryell County and Eastland. Eastland County Courthouse has an interesting display at the entrance. They have an embalmed hornytoad encased in a coffin on display. Old Rip is a local hero and his annual parade is coming up in February. Clinton, hit me up with a link to Rip's story in the comments. While in Eastland, I ate at the Texas Cattle Exchange. A tasty restaurant that offers an excellent all you can eat buffet. The restaurant portion of the building is fairly small with about 15 tables of 4. Also in the building is a section with offices. Most notably, a 3rd door takes you to the cattle showcase area. In this cold room, you'll find a strong cattle smell coming from the outside barns and arenas. There is seating in this area and a small section below where cows can be brought in. Here, in the mud/hay the cows are bid on. But my favorite part of the story: in this cold, smelly barn, Eastland residents have church services every Sunday. The only comment I had was, 'I bet they have really good nativity scenes.'

That night I returned to Conroe through Dublin (picked me up some Dublin Dr. Pepper) and CS. The higlight of my week occurred after we beat OU in basketball. That night, Penny and I travled to Dallas to see Sister Hazel in concert. We were met there by a few of her friends and Nick and Vanessa. SH rocked. Pretty good live show. Afterwards, I got the guys to sign my ticket. My A&M Basketball ticket. We didn't have a ticket to the show because Penny won some all acess passes, which were in the form of stickers. With no real alternative, I handed them my basketball ticket and they were happy to autograph it. I spent that night at Nick's place. It's definitely nicer than mine. We had some late night Denny's after the show where we were entertained (annoyed) by a group of children singing (yelling) such hits as The Hokey Pokey and Barbie Girl. No idea why these children were out past midnight, but they should have definitely been elsewhere.

Now, I'm flying to Midland where I'll see Clinton. The progressive Ranch Reunion is nearly complete. The trip takes me all the way across Texas. But I'm excited. Honestly, I much preferred having Ranch get-togethers in the hall between the kitchen and the bathroom of Apartment 19 on Balcones Drive... But this is quite enjoyable too.

Iced In

The ice has made its way to Conroe now, so I get an ice day! The funny thing is that by simply moving a space in "an ice day," you get "a nice day." Let's see you kids in Dallas and Midland do something that clever with your snow day...

A&M remains closed. I hope Penny has been enjoying her 6 day weekend, because I assure you those don't come around too often. I only got a couple of days off total in my 4 years at A&M, never 2 in a row. I'm sure all the students are enjoying it. It's not as hard of a freeze as we had last year in CS. Ice Days aren't nearly as fun without someone to share icecicle breaking and bush kicking with...


Onto the reason I'm posting. Aside from my trip to Lenny's and to pick up the Yukon for my trip to Laredo tomorrow, I've spent most of the day in front of the tv. Cold Pizza, Price Is Right, Home Improvement, Family Feud. I can't wait until I'm retired. But why is it that daytime commercials are so terrible? Are old people such eager consumers that you don't need to hire professional actors to sell them a product? Some of these commercials look like they were filmed in someone's front yard. "Hi I'm Jim. I bought auto insurance. It's for my car. Call now." You know, something like that. That's not going to sell me anything, but apparently the old people eat it up. And Head On? I don't know what it is, but you apply it directly to your forehead.

One hypothesis you might have is, "Maybe all the great minds are too busy playing game shows during the day to make commercials." Well that is false. This is apparent by watching any game show that airs during the day. Skipping over the doozies that were on The Price Is Right, allow me to share with you a phrase that is never said on Family Feud. "That is a terrible answer." Why is this never said. This should be the catch phrase of Family Feud along with every other daytime game show.

Host: "100 people polled, answers are on the board. What is the main thing the women who are feeling fat want to avoid?"
Response: "Umm..oh! Giraffe Riding! Yeah!"
Family: "Good anwser! Oh yeah! Good answer!"

If you can't be honest with your family, who can you be honest with? That's a terrible answer. Say "Food" dummy. Wishful thinking and denial that your family is an idiot is not worth any points.

And now Family Feud has ended, Maury has begun. This episode: "Did My Man Cheat Because I Only Have One Leg?" There is surely no redeeming quality in this ridiculous show.

As I began to wind this blog down, I understood why there are no good commercials on during the day. I wouldn't want any of my work associated with the stupidity displayed on daytime television either. Way to go good commercial makers.

Still Here

It's been a tough week here at the office, but we're surviving. Haven't got a whole lot to say other than that.

Shout out to Karen for housing me when I was in CS, Nick's gone for good, so I was nearly homeless. Props to Nick for his first day on the job. Talked too him at lunch and all was good.

Clinton and I solved a tough case this week in regard to some suspicious activity we saw. We really should open up a Detective Office.

Last topic to address is the number of people that read my blog through facebook. Just to let you know, this is done through Blogspot, facebook imports info from here automatically. I'm surprised at how many people told me they read it. I don't know if they ever comment on it though as I dont check facebook very often. http://chriswilson06.blogspot.com/ is the best way to have me read any comments you make. Word to all my readers, I'm looking at you Ched.

Alright, longer, more thought provoking post coming in the future, I promise. Until then, let me share with you a blog that Karen sent to me asking "Is It True?":

Look…

I’m about to shed some light on the bizarre brains of men.

This impending enlightenment is the fruit of 30 years of male observation.

So go get your cute little journals girls...oh...and your colored pens.

I wish what I was about to tell you was something incredibly fantastic, but you see, that’s one of the illusions called man.

When you are single, you think that men are mysteries waiting to be solved.

You think they are deep because they’re silent.

You think they are strong because they are solemn.

No. Not hardly.

Men are very easy to read.

They are quiet because they either don’t know what to say, they aren't aware they are supposed to be saying something, or they weren't even sure you were talking to them in the first place.

They can be calm, grounded and solemn because they don't know they should be trying to impress you, even though you’re practically hula hooping with your hair on fire to get their attention.

Here’s a little known tidbit about men that should alarm you.

Got your purple pen?

They all play this game in their minds called, "The What If Game."

For the first half of my life I lived with a brother who would randomly say, "What if we had to walk backwards everywhere we went?" "What if we had to chew our food 50 times, spit it out and then eat it again?" "What if dogs could talk, but only in French, so we still couldn’t understand them?" "What if I had to sleep with my legs sticking straight up in the air?" "What if this roll of wall paper was stuck in my forehead? I would be like a unicorn. How would I put on my shirts?"

That was my life with Jason.

I thought I would be saying goodbye to this WASTE OF TIME thought process once I finally got my new double consonant name (I would have married a man with the last name of Hoogleberry to obtain this).

Wrong.

After I said, "I do," I quickly said, "This cannot be happening." I got married and found out that Aaron plays the same insane little game. I don’t know why, but "The What If Game" makes me want to hit him in the face with a cookie sheet.

He and Jason were both so serious about their "What Ifs." That's the most unsettling part. They really and truly expect you to begin problem solving over these made up scenarios. Really. I'm not joking. They see nothing wrong with logically trying to solve an illogical problem.

Aaron will pick the most inopportune times to amuse himself with the what ifs. We'll be getting ready for a birthday party or for company to come over and it will hit him..."What if I were a goat?" I'm trying to hurry, and he's chewing on napkins.

How are we still married?

Moments before I catapulted myself out of the bed to type this man betrayal, I was lying there next to my husband. He looks at me and says with his jaws clenched together, "What if I couldn’t open my mouth ever again."

Unfortunately I don’t keep cookie sheets in our bed. I will from now on.

I made a loud, "UGGGGH."

I then told him I had to know what is wrong with men. Why do they do this? It must be all men, because I’m no mathematician (actually, I can’t even tell time properly) but what are the chances that my brother and husband BOTH play the dumb "What if Game?"

Aaron informed me that he and Mike have already discussed this and they both do it and think all men do. I had him immediately call Allen. Allen was my only hope. I thought for sure Allen would not partake in this pitiful past time. Even Allen does it. Allen.

Why?

Why?

Why?

Why waste brain time thinking about what ifs…and not what ifs that matter. They aren’t trying to save the world in case a meteor strikes. They are not endeavoring to solve global warming. They aren't trying to lower our gas prices.

They aren’t even trying to get ready for this "what if"… "What if the electricity goes out?" I don’t think we have one flashlight that works around here.

Oh no.

They spend their time thinking about if their legs could only fold backwards, or their skin was inside out or if everyone had to keep their wallets in their cheeks.

Aaron informed me that one time when he was taking a bath (I can’t believe I’m even saying that since I hate that everyone knows this sad fact about my darling husband) he took a whole bath not using his arms because on the way into the bathtub, this thought unfortunately crossed his mind..."What if I didn’t have arms."

Why?

Why?

Why?

He even came to the conclusion that he would have to invent a faux arm that stuck out of the bathroom wall so that after he squeezed the shampoo onto his head, using his feet, he could rub his soapy head up against the prosthetic fingers. The phony fingers would aid in the lathering process so his hair could be nice and undandruffy.

What?

So, ladies…if you have ever thought that men are a mystery, now you know that they in fact are…just not an exciting mystery…more like a disturbing, what the heck is wrong with them mystery.

Fess up boys, you know you do this.

I’m so on to you.

So on to you.
posted by Hendrick Family @ 5:45 PM

I did not know this was a huge mystery ladies. I thought it was widely known... My response to Karen was:

Unfortunately Karen, this is true. Here's a question for you. Do you think Nick and I would have dropped out of Accounting if we spent more time studying and less time asking, "Hey, what if I was sitting here across the table from you and all of the sudden a guy broke that window and pulled you through it? Would I keep studying? I think I would."

This What If game also affects camping preperation. "What if we need toilet paper, what if we run out of food. What if we need a shopping cart on the 4 mile hike??" Thus, extra toilet paper, extra food, and a shopping cart were taken to Lake Somerville.

How do you think we keep ourselves entertained? We don't sing Kelly Clarkson songs in our head or play matchmaker. If you know Nick and me, you should know that this game is constantly played and eternally fun. It is the basis for many in depth conversations as well as arguments. I never knew this was a mystery to you, I thought it was the way things were... Maybe it's the Boy Scouts' fault. "While ya'll are baking brownies, we're taught to "Always Be Prepared." "What if I need to skin a rabbit?" goes hand and hand with "What if I couldn't walk, but could only hop around like a rabbit?" And remember, there's only one way to skin a rabbit, but there are lots of preperations to make if you wake up as a rabbit. What would you eat? What kind of clothes would you wear? Would you move into a hole? (The rent is cheaper...)

Alright, later on peeps.

Had a Birthday

Yeah, I had a birthday, whoop-de-doo. I spent the week in San Marcos, my pre-birthday dinner was held in CS for those that were able to come. My birthday party was held in our clients' office in San Marcos, I had cake and everything. Very hospitable people! Dinner was in Austin with my two Aggie friends, Lindsay and Clayton. I ate at Hula Hut and then had Amy's Ice Cream for the first time. For Free! It was a good birthday, unfortunately someone tried to ruin it right off the bat by stealing my morning paper from the hotel. The bad birthday streak is finally broken!

Lubbock Life

I made it safely. Flew in the little plane, wandered the Medical Science Center on tech's campus, drove North 45 minutes to a land that still had snow on it, and most notably hit my 2nd tumbleweed in the rental car (PT Cruiser).

And now the pay off, I'm sitting in my hotel room eating the Fatty Cakes Special. That's right, a combination of Taco Bueno and Krispy Kreme. Can life get better? I submit that it can.... If I was planted firmly in College Station.

Headed West

As I sit in IAH waiting for a flight to Lubbock, allow me to share
another story from DC. One afternoon we ate at the Metro Station.
There was fast food as far as the eye could see. As I walked past the
endless line of shops, one woman reached out and forced a sample upon
me. It was some sort of chinese chicken (chickety china...), terriaki
perhaps. I tried it, looked up at the sign that read 'Cajun Food,'
shrugged and continued on. As I made my way back down the line, she
offered me another sample. I stopped her and said, 'This sign says
cajun food...but there's no cajun food,' pointing at the fried rice
and eggrolls she had on display. 'Yes it is,' she said in an Asian
accent, 'we have spicy chicken.' I shrugged again and continued onto
'Bland Burritos,' the place I ate at and renamed to suit it better. I
saw no Mexican food in my time there and the cajun food was oddly
chinese looking. Food outside of Texas just isn't the same.

So, I am at the very end of the airport waiting for a bus to pull up
to my gate to take me to my teeny, tiny airplane. This will be
exciting. Almost as exciting as getting up at 6am this morning. Last
night's game against LSU was a tough one to watch. While I don't
often blame officiating for a loss, last night's refs certainly didn't
help. With Jones getting bogus fouls within the first 2 minutes, we
were severely handicapped the rest of the night. And the nonsensical
calls didn't stop there. Did Big Baby have a halo around him I don't
know about...?

There is spanish coming out of the ceiling above me right now.
'Quince y dose milion!' 'Que?' 'Dose milion!' The loud speaker has
drowned them out now reminding me not to make jokes about the security
or else I'll be arrested. Such a pleasant voice for such a harsh
threat...

15 minutes till I board now. What am I doing in Lubbock you may ask.
Well, I am taking some clients to lunch and then going 45 minutes
north to Plainview to pick up some of our equipment. I was also
notified yesterday that I'll be doing some unexpected training for an
employee there that was hired out of the blue.

There is a punk looking kid behid me. Black shirt, black hoodie,
black pen in hand drawing on his arm. When I came in he was staring
at a small knit blanket that had some sort of Germanish words
embroidered on it. Security threat? He wishes....

Come Back To Texas

Well, I'm headed back to Conreezy now. Quite the opposite of the
flight we had coming into DC. This flight is packed, no open seats. No elbow room.

I just got back from the airplane bathroom. Now that's a small
bathroom. And I've now retaken my window seat next to Brad and Baird.
I'm done reading my Sports Illustrated and Baird has my book 'The
Tipping Point' so now I'm just sitting here, glancing up every once in
a while to see what scene Angela is on as she watches Dumb and Dumber.
I'm not quite sure where we are as I cannot see any state lines from
where I am... I'm ready to get home, not because I miss my own bed
(Ive been sleeping better in hotels), but because I miss setting my
own sleeping hours. These people have worn me out. I also miss CST.

Overall, the trip was better than expected. I really did enjoy
hanging out with the coworkers and their significant others. DC was
surprisingly multi-dimensional. Seeing the government and historical
stuff was cool. Whenever I watch CSpan now (I like watching the
people in the background fall asleep) I can say 'That's congress!
I've been in there!' We also went to the other attractions;
washington monument, the big abe lincoln, changing of the guard at the
tomb of the unknown soldier, etc. There are also many Smithsonians.
The others went to the air and space one while I visited the museum of
the American Indian. It was well done and was very artistic, but with
an hour to spend there, I had to rush through. There were also great
restraunts and we dined well.there was shopping in Georgetown and many
universities. And then of course the city stuff. Multi-dimensional.

The traffic there was amazing. Everyone was in a hurry and rude. If
you weren't easing into the intersection by the time the light was
green, you would get an instant honk. Blinkers and speed limits
weren't necessary and neither were manners. The drivers there were
the worst I've ever witnessed, but what was impressive is the fact
that their cursing could be heard over blaring horns. And if you
couldn't hear them, well, they also knew sign language.

The subway was my favorite part of the trip. The mass transit in DC
is a breeze. The subway was so efficient and easy to use. The only
part that was troublesome were the homeless peole outside that would
yell at you. Friday night we came across a crazy man in a rage,
yelling and threatening passerbys. The next night another man begin
yelling at us about 'Hoyas' and while everyone became uneasy, I was
able to make him happy by yelling 'Beat Duke, Go Hoyas.' Of course
the Hoyas lost to Duke later that night and therefore we did our best
to avoid that man on the way home in fear he was in a rage...

We seem to be over some small green rural town now with a few rivers
flowing through them. So we could be anywhere between DC and Houston.
I'm ready to get home, eat some Lenny's, watch some ESPN News, and
pack for Wednesday...

Just to reassure all of you, this was typed on my phone while it's in
'Airplane Mode' so we weren't in any danger. I'll be posting this
upon landing.

In Flight

Once again, it's time for my not-so-often check in. Go, go, go. That's all I seem to do. So much so that this blog will be posted from my cell phone. As I type this, I am sitting on a plane headed for DC. A little secret... I've never flown before. Of course this actually isn't too big of a secret to anyone other then my coworkers. Right about now Kristie and Keaton are napping, Baird and Angela are reading the paper, Brad is flipping through the catalog of worthless items that came from the back of the seat in front of him, and of course the guy behind me is extending his feet well out of his space and touching the back of me feet. I've already read this month's edition of Texas Aggie magazine as well as flipped through an art.com catalog I receive at my apartment.

As a first time flyer, I don't see what the big deal is. I don't see any reason to have jitters or be afraid to fly. How often do planes crash? Not very. Heck, I'm comfortable enough to talk about it while sitting in an airborne plane. I drive down hwy 6 at least twice a week. I think that is much more dangerous.

Take off was a lot of fun. I grabbed a window seat of course. This wasn't hard to do as there are very few passengers on the plane. I have 3 seats to myself. Watching us ascend or rather watching the ground seemingly descend was pretty cool. Looking over the city you live in from the sky is something I always think is neat. We've obviously traveled much higher now so all I see is a white plane of clouds which is pretty cool too. As I looked out the window upon typing that, I also noticed a jet in the distance flying a bit lower then us leaving a stream behind him.

This has bee a fun pain free experience, I only worry about next week when I have to fly alone and don't have someone to print my boarding pass for me and someone to follow around to mimic their checkin routine. Yes, 2 roundtrip flights in a week. That reflects my busy schedule. My weeks ahead look like this: DC, Conroe, Lubbock, Conroe, CS, San Marcos, Conroe, CS, San Marcos, Conroe, CS, Corpus. Before the month is up, I'm hoping to have stayed in my new apt for a total of 7 days...

These past weeks have been busy too. Thanksgiving was good, its always good to go see th family. It's even better when the family comes back with you to clean your oldapt and help you set up your new one. My mom was terrified I was going to be living out of boxes for the next few months. Which honestly would have happened. I greatly appreciated all they did. I was in Decatur all this week which wasn't bad. Long trip, but decent city. I always enjoy dining at the local places.

Huge props to my Texas A&M Athletics. That goes to my elite 8 ladies, the tsip beating football team and both top 10 basketball teams. Word to you Bill Byrne.

We're below cloud cover now and I see a city coming into view. Hopefully its Baltimore. Is that a coast that isn't the Gulf? Never seen that before. When we get landed, I'll be able to post this. Theres Mr Capitan confirming my suspicions. We're landing. I'll be in DC till Sunday. See yall soon, sorry I'm missing your visit Clinton...

Represent that SW Conroe

Hey y'all, I'm still here. Thought I'd drop in with an update on things out this way. So the roommate search didn't go well. Most of the roommates I tried contacting did not check their account after I sent the messages. Other then Rent.com, the rest of the roommate finder websites are terrible and want you to pay them to read messages in their poorly designed websites. Oh well. I got me a new place about 15 minutes Southeast of here. I'll be living in South West Conroe. Since moving here, that has probably been my favorite part of the city. It's not a densely populated as the rest of Conroe and trees abound. There are a couple of parks nearby, which is important, one park includes skate ramps, which I won't use, but I thought was cool. It's closer to work and about 10 minutes from The Woodlands. It's further from Aggieland, so the drive back will be a little over an hour now. Also, my grocery shopping will have to move from the nice Lake Conroe Wal-Mart to the ghetto Conroe one...

Now I'm just sitting here on the couch with ESPN News playing. A familiar occurance. I always have high expectations for my days after I leave work. I'm gonna work out, write a novel and free Tibet. I make plans in my head of things that I need to do or want to do and keep these in mind till the end of the day. There is some place on HW 105, halfway between work and my apartment where everyday I realize I don't want to follow through with anything I wanted to do earlier and just look forward to sitting until it's bedtime. Hopefully with the move, I won't have to travel over that stretch of road where this realization occurs and will accomplish much more.

I move November 18th-19th. I would apprciate any volunteers to help me. Otherwise it's just me and Anna Belle. And Anna refuses to move furniture... When should I start packing? Maybe tomorrow. Today I just want to sit.

Monsoon Season!

It was bright and shiny leaving work from Conroe today, by the time I made it to Montgomery, I was caught in a Monsoon! It's from Canada I hear! Cool weather for an afternoon game, I'll take it!

I found a park on the south side of town that I like, it'll hopefully be a usual stop on the way home so I can get some excercise. To solve my housing woes, I think I've settled on an option. Stay right where I am, don't change my address and continue paying what I have been. The perfect solution? Yeah, now I have to find a roommate. There are a couple I found on the internet (this is worse than internet dating) and Brad said he had someone looking for a place to live in no other than, Montgomery. Who looks specifically to live in Montgomery anyway? Oh well, he's the clear leader right now. Second place goes to this guy:

I'm 20. Currently living at home with mom and dad. My older brother moved out two weeks ago and it had me thinking that it's about time I moved out also. I have no trouble paying rent seeing as how i have been working since i was 15 and have held my current job for almost three years now. I'm really easy going and easy to get along with. And I love penguins ^_^

Nyck...yeah, with a y. I've lived with a Nick before, but this whole Nyck thing would be new. We'll see. Penny automattically eliminated the 18 year old girl looking for a roomie. I automatically eliminated this 59 Year Old Man: "I will need a roommate by Dec 1.I'm not looking for a bed mate.My dog is a short but long black Dashund"

I'll let you know how this turns out. For now, it's me, Anna Belle and Hokie football.

All By Myself

Well, the first reason I need to update this thing is to clear out the comments so that Clinton has a clean space to work with. Next, I just need to. It's been forever.

I'm going to Corpus this week for a pretty awesome wedding, it's going to be good. Congrats Emily and Zach.

Kevin just left, he's on spot team. He'll be gone for 4 weeks at a time, coming back for 1. Meaning, the next time he'll be here, it'll be to clean his stuff out of the apartment as I perpare to move again...

I'll be coming off my probationary period in November, my coworkers like me and have decided to keep me.

So I'm rockin it by myself once again. He left a lot of food though, so I've gotta work hard to clear that out for him. Come visit y'all. Hwy 105, you know.

My Cat Misses Me

Over the past few weeks, the only night I've consequtively stayed at my apartment has been Thursday night. It's pretty sad that I've spent more time sleeping at Nick's apartment than my own over the past 2 weeks. It's even sadder that I've spent more time in Austin than in Montgomery during the same 2 weeks...

Anywho, it's been good. I really have enjoyed it despite being away from my apartment almost constantly. This next week I'll get a slight break. I'll be out of town Thursday and Friday. The only night I'll be away is Thursday night. I'll be spending the night in Sugar Land and unfortunately missing Penny's Ring Day which I was really wanting to make it to. I hope she can forgive me.

These past couple of weeks, I've really taken a step up in my job. I've kind of been let out on my own and was in charge when I was in Austin. In Sugar Land, I'll be alone to run the seminar and dine our clients. Hopefully this responsibility will help me feel more competent than I currently feel. I'm working on it.

The Ags convincingly won their football game and despite it being a game against ULaLa, they looked Very impressive. This game boosts my spirits much more than the Citadel game did. Soccer however suffered 2 losses this week against 2 top 10 schools. Regroup Ags, we'll get em Friday.

Just a quick post because Clinton's Aliases are harassing me and because I actually have a couple of minutes to type before bed.

And now before I close out, let me add one thing I just witnessed. My cat, in the bathroom, slid off the back of the toilet, caught the handle and flushed it as she fell in the shower. Thanks Anna Belle!

A couple more cities

Well, another week, some more travel. I'm Austin, just arrived from Kileen. Kileen was a good visit, a very confusing city, but pretty cool people. Definately likable and they have more stories than I do... Well, I'm about to head for dinner and whatever else comes our way tonight. Tomorrow morning, there's a big meeting that we're attending to meet, greet, and learn a little bit more about some state recommendations that have been made for County Health Care. That's what we're here for. I'll be back next week for fun and then business. But first comes the weekend that I have been waiting for. Two top notch soccer games and kickoff weekend for Football. Whoop! Now is you wit me?

Aggie Sports

Fall sports are back! In the most amazing soccer game I have ever witnessed, we beat Soccer Powerhouse North Carolina in double OT. Along the way, we also Shattered the all-time regular season NCAA attendence record. This ladies soccer team is a special team and I'm looking forward to bringing a National Championship home. It wont be easy thought as we play the #1 and #2 teams along with 2 more top 10 teams in the next couple of weeks. I love Aggieland.

And since volleyball posted 2 wins at their tournament, right now the Aggies are undefeated in sports so far this season.

Keepin It Real In Kerrville

Why does Housekeeping in these hotels always leave the curtains wide open for you when you return to your room? Don't they know the first thing I want to do is take off my pants? Well now it gets kicked down to 2nd... Right behind Close The Curtains...

Multi-tasking

I'm watching the TV for Reggie to come out in his Bengal uniform, keeping track of what's going on over on TexAgs, updating McLennan County for work while I wait for my pizza to cook. I thought I might as well check in on my blog. Once again, I'm going to reitterate the reason for my sudden abscence. I work on my computer most of the day on a typical workday. When I come home, staring at the screen literally makes me want to vomit...

I'm doing very well here in Montgomery, enjoying everything. Very excited about football season of course. And definately looking forward to the Soccer game next week (even if it is an exhibitiion). Other than that, I'm keeping it real, lived it up in SA last week. I like that town more everytime I go. Which is good, because I'll be back like 4 times in the next couple of months....

Lastly, this just occured to me. I don't really like Olive Garden commercials. Super cheesey. Have any of you seen a family like that at Olive Garden? Anyway, I think TexAgs crashed and I'm going to go check on my pizza.

Alright, check in is over, now I'm checkin back out.

Quick Notes

Yeah, I've been busy. Driving all around North East Texas yesterday left me little room for anything else. Tomorrow I'll be in La Grange. Not much else happening. Oh yes, good news. I got the product management position that I'd interviewed for Months ago. I never heard back from them until today, it was a job I was quite interested in. Oh well, I told them I already have a job and I'm right where I want to be.

It's bedtime now. So I bid you a good night.

Round Trip

Well, a round trip to Kileen and back wasn't what I was expecting today. Spending the majority of my time in the car makes me feel like the day was wasted. Some IT problems up there barred us from doing what we traveled all that way to do. On the way back to Conroe, I was almost scheduled to take a trip to Larado tomorrow. Luckily, I missed out on that one. Who wants to drive even more tomorrow?

Waco Wisdom

As I get ready to depart for Belton tomorrow, let me share with you a few more tidbits of knowledge I acquired from the Waco trip.

First, an important thing to remember if you're exploring the Baylor campus unguided, is that Memorial Hall does not house classrooms, faculty offices, or a student center. It is a girl's dorm and I'm not supposed to be in there. Especially on a week when it's full of mothers and daughters attending an orientation.

The business school in Waco isn't as good as Mays Business School at A&M, but the influence of A&M is felt there. The first conversation I heard on campus was in Baylor's business school. It was a little after 7PM and some students were walking up the stairs from some territory I had not explored. One of them hogged the conversation as they passed me, "And A&M...please..they're even worse! This is their schedule! The first two weeks they play Army and The Citadel (incorrect). Then they play Louisiana-Lafayette and some other pansy cupcake team. A&M is pathetic..." Before I could correct him on his schedule errors, they'd progressed to a classroom.

The most important lesson I learned in Waco was college is important, it holds the key to your dreams. This became apparent during dinner at Taco Bueno. As I walked up to the counter to order, the cashier took notice of my Freebirds shirt.
The cashier put his fists in the air and exclaimed "Freebird!"
I looked at him, nodded and said "Yeah!"
"Now is that the band Freebird?" He asked?
Well to be honest with you, bro, Freebird is a song, not a band. I simply answered, "No, it's a burrito place."
"Oh, is it as good as Taco Bueno?" He asked, beaming with pride for his employer.
"No way dude, Taco Bueno is awesome."
"Yeah!" He exclaimed. "Where is this Freebird place?"
"Well, there are 4 in College Station. There are also some in Houston and Austin and stuff," I responded.
"I bet you went to school in College Station, didn't you?" He asked.
"Yep, just graduated in May, I'm up here for my job." I told him, giving him more information than he asked for.
He returned the favor by providing me excess information, "I was gonna go to college once." He paused. "But they told me I couldn't drink beer. So me and my brother decided we didn't want to go to college."
As he spoke, I glanced at him with a confused look on my face.
"Yeah," he continued, "Looking back, I probably could have gone to college and drank beer."
"Probably," I told him, trying to hide the amusement I was getting from his reflection.
"College..." He said, "If I would have gone, I would have done robotics. I'd be rich right now." He went on in an Uncle Rico-esque manner, "I would have built something, I don't know, like....like uhh... A Robotic Taco Maker!"
I chuckled, he didn't. I proceeded to give him my order and told him to have a nice day. Sadly, I'm afraid barring a taco maker invention, the story depressed him for the rest of the day.

Goodbye Ol Chap

This morning I sit in an empty looking downstairs apartment on Balcones. Boxes cover the couch in this living room, a bag of mine lays on the floor. This is one of the few rooms that still has furniture in it. My room sits down the hall, having been vacant for a few months now. The newest vacancy is the next room over. The last time this room was vacant, it was a joyous occasion. It meant the opening of our study room/dance room/rec room. But that's because we knew soon we would have another roommate. Early this morning, Clinton hit the road to Midland to set up his new home. I don't like the way things are changing, it feels weird. As time progressed, the distance seperating two friends has changed from 15 feet to 45 miles and now over 450 miles. This house, my first real home away from Corpus is going to be completely empty in little over a month. It will become a foreign place to me, where I will no longer be welcome. Strangers will be living and making memories in what in our minds is Our Home. The past 3 years have gone by fast, but it seems that we've lived here for a much longer time. I know it's nothing to complain about, it's just a different feeling than I've experienced. The fact that all of our lives are changing is something that's hard to grasp until the change actually occurs. The saddest reminder of the change is the foam letters that Nick and Clinton would always message each other with in the shower. They know spell out "Goodbye Ol Chap" on the bathroom wall.

Well good, the siamese cat from down the hall has jumped in my lap to console me. The only problem though is that she's changed too. For some unexplicable reason, she smells like skunk...

Feeling Old

I just returned from my adventure on the Campus of Baylor University. I think I have more stories from this trip to Waco than any other recent trip. Also, I came to a life-changing realization. I'm old.

That's it, plain and simple. In this 22nd year of my life, it hit me for the first time. The feeling of growing up, the understanding that I'm not young anymore. Now, before any of you skip down to the bottom and comment on this, let me explain how this happened. I take you back to last night. I'm in Waco, I'd been invited by Chelsea's brother to play a little Ultimate Frisbee. Now, I've played Ultimate like one time since high school, so I'm a little rusty. I agree to play anyway. When I show up, the game is already going on. I'm assigned to the shirts team and we end up winning (an amazing comeback really, but that's a different story). After the game, we gather as a group and they begin chatting. I stand silent mainly, as I don't really know anybody here. Then a girl addresses me. Gathering from my shirt that I'm an Aggie, she says, "So, do you, like, go to A&M?" Feeling a little uncomfortable being the oldest guy out there, I tell her, "Yep...I Go to A&M."
"Cool! That's where I'm going next year!" She exclaims. "So, whatcha doin in Waco?"
I glance around uneasily as all ears are turned my way.
"Actually, I graduated from college. I'm here for my job..."
"Oh.." She trails off. All of her excitement quickly fades. All eyes still on me as I grow uncomfortable.
"Yeah, I'm a college graduate, an adult. Playing with a bunch of high schoolers," would have been an appropriate reply and those words definately crossed my mind.
The discomfort was eased by the dude next to me telling me that he was a sophomore at ACU. The truth of the matter was I was surrounded by recent high school graduates and first or second year college students. The trend was towards the younger side of things however. The actual situation wasn't as bad as it seemed in my mind, but after I announced I was a college graduate, no one addressed me other than the ACU kid.

Afterwards I thought about it. Did I ever hang out with collge graduates when I graduated from high school? No... Especially not ones I didn't know. That's just weird. Why? Because they were old!

A Couple of Links

I'm busy here in Waco. But I will share with you a couple of links that I stumbled upon today.

First, this is probably my favorite news story:

http://msn.foxsports.com/nba/story/5766288?FSO1&ATT=HMA

And secondly, this website was brought to my attention by Clinton. It's a website where people can go submit their secrets for all to read. Get it off your chest, feel better, blah blah. It's a marketing campaign for Secret Deodorant. BUT, look at the secret I found on there!

http://www.secret.com/share/secrets.asp?id=3186

Technology

Last night I went to Lakeside Bible church, got to meet several people my age. College students of course. I'm not old enough to feel comfortable sitting at a table with a man and his wife and kids as I began the night doing. The college crowd was much more comfortable. As I said, this is a small church, so the college group was about 7 people. All of them were totally cool, people I could hang out with. We went to IHOP after church, apparently the place to hang out in Lake Conroe. Not as cool as Sonic or Whataburger, but a decent hangout nonetheless. I'm sad because I'll be gone for the next couple of Wednesdays and Sundays, so I'll be absent from this church.

Anyway, I'm pretty tired of technology. Working at my company, all of my time is spent near a computer or at least talking about them. When I come home, the thought of sitting in front of another one kid of makes me nausiated, so this is all I'm typing. I will now sit on the couch and shoot nerf darts for my cat to chase.

"Blow North Korea Off The Map" Party!

And all 191 of you countires are invited! Come on China! Frane, you can join us. Australia, you're always welcome! And what the heck, Principality of Sealand, we'll see you there! Yeah, World Party!

What is that crazy little North Korean man going to do next?

Happy 4th of July!

When I showed up to work this morning, I found out that we only had to be there till noon. So it's 3:00PM now and I'm already in College Station blogging. And this is after a nap! I love half days.

Other than that, have a great 4th of July and I know it's very cliche, but do remember how lucky you are to have the freedoms that we have here in the United States. People have a lot of complaints with the country and the government, but shut your mouth for a second and realize what a blessing it is to live free in a country as great as ours.

One Year and Counting

And so today marks mine and Penny's one year anniversary. Funny how one year's time can seem so short and yet it seems like I've known her forever.

One year and I love her more than ever.

Home again

I made it back home. 7 Hour drive from Falfurrias. Why? Because we hit Houston traffic at 5PM on a Friday...of a holiday weekend. Probably the number one worst time to come through H-town. I don't know how Anna is going to like me going to Waco in a couple of weeks. She's mad at me as it is. She's always mad at me, but especially since I left her her for the past 3 days. Kevin visited her briefly to check on her, but about 99% of the time was spent alone. And she got locked in the bathroom. She wasn't happy about being cooped up. Poor thing.

I wish she spoke English. I could tell her what is going on. And to stop getting in my bathtub...

On to Corpus Christi

First off, typically I won't be traveling this much forever. Right now is the busy time for us. Couple the fact that this is the time in which we do upgrades with the fact that there are a lot of conventions and such that we need to be at during the summer and the result is a busy traveling schedule for the company. Now add in the fact that I am new and they want me to be exposed to all of this, so they send me along on most travel oppurtunities that arise. And that my friends is why I'm in a different city every week. My stay in Montgomery was short. I came back from the Plano and Kerrville trip Thursday night plenty tired and ready for sleep, so I unpacked quickly, dumped my dirty clothes in the hamper, threw my clean clothes in the closet and went to sleep as soon as I could. Friday I left work early and after a short nap, I made my way to CS for the weekend. It was a great weekend. We celebrated Penny's birthday Sunday night, so I got to see and hang out with everyone, just like the old days (6 weeks ago). After work on Monday, I once again drove to College Station for the night to spend the evening with Penny on her birthday. I thouroughly enjoyed the time I spent with her, as always. Once I got home late Monday night, it was sleep time. After work on Tuesday, Kevin and I went and ate at the Magnolia Diner which had just opened right next door to my apartment. I'd been anticipating the opening ever since I moved in. The atmosphere was nice, the food was decent, but I was a bit disappointed. After going to Wal-Mart with Kevin it was already nearing after 10PM. So I quickly washed some clothes, which then caused a shift of dirty clothes to the closet floor and clean clothes in the hamper. Make-shift organization often causes a mess. After packing, I slept. I woke up this morning at 5:15, got ready and headed to Corpus with my coworker. I'll be here till Friday evening, which means I will arrive home late Friday night to a mess I still surely won't want to deal with. And in closing, that is why I haven't blogged...

Somewhere in the whirlwind of activity, I also changed cell phone providers. My motorola...ahem my third Motorola in a row gave out on me. Perfect time for me to compare phone companies. T-Mobile came out on top for me. I knew what phone I wanted, all the companies provided a similar one. And my research put T-Mobile over Cingular most notably on price and service rating.

My family just left, we went to eat at Fridays. I'm sorry I won't have anymore time to spend with them this week. I don't get down here as often as I'd like.

Alright... I am tired. But it's only 8:30, so I'm going to go to Barnes and Noble and hang out till I'm ready to come back and go to bed. They're open till 11, I won't be utilizing those hours to the fullest, I promise.

Holdin It Down In Plano

Yeah, I'm in Plano. This internet cost me...well the company $10. The stinkin' Marriott doesn't give free internet. Bums... Anyway, I'm put up in this Marriott in Legacy Park. Plano's got it goin on. I haven't got to get out too much. I've walked around here, eaten at a few of the restaraunts around the block. I was at the Fox Sports Grill tonight since I was on my own. Its good to see that there are some hockey fans here in Texas. All the diners were rooting for Carolina in tonight's Stanley Cup Game 7. Most lilkely because they want America to beat Canada in this Carolina Vs. Ottawa championship. It looks to me that it will have that outcome. It's currently 2-1 Carolina's favor in the 3rd. Anyway I'll be leaving here at noon tomorrow to go to Kerrville. I think I'll be sharing a room with the boss man, so I doubt I'll get too much internet access. It's been a busy day, met some comissioners and judges, including the guy responsible for getting those protestors off Bush's ranch. An interesting mix of liberals and ultra conservatives. Lunch was Mi Cocina. No, not the one in CS, a different chain that actually serves decent Mexican food. Especially if you like live bees in your tacos. Yeah, our food got comped because there was a bumble bee walking around my plate when they brought it out. Oh well, it's not like we pay for the meals anyway. Ottawa's got a powerplay now. Better get back to the game.

Kitten's Greatest Hits

Alright, I'm about to head out of town. But before I do, I decided to put up another video. This has been up for about a week and 112 people viewed it. I've made Kitten a star! The video of course is the classic, "Flying Kitten." Enjoy.

Business Trip

Hey kids, it's Friday, whoop! I haven't gotten to whoop too much since getting here, I just realized that. Anyway, I doubt I'll be able to blog too much either this next week. I will be in Dallas all week for work, so I can't promise any posts between now and then. Just a heads up for y'all. Hope summer school is going well for all you kiddos, I plan on being in College Station next weekend. And those of you that aren't in school, it's pretty awesome not having any homework, isn't it? Alright, keep it real and just roll it back like Wal-Mart.

Creativity

It's been a long week here in Montgomery county. Not that I've done all that much other then go to work. Maybe that's the problem. My cat is no longer in heat, which means I'm not nearly as irritated with her. Kevin recieved a rather nice BBQ pit from his dad, he brought it up here Monday and we assembled it last night. It's pretty nice, but when we were done, it was much past dinner time, so we had to settle for an IHOP dinner.

Now let me tell you a few of the people's names that I've encountered recently. First, there is Arizona Jean. If her last name was Company, it still wouldn't be cool... Secondly, of course, is Mary Christmas. And finally, the woman with the first name Queen and the last name Elizabeth. Ok, let me remind you that creativity is important, but people, please, you do not get points for creativity when you're naming your children.

Anyway, mainly I just wanted to post to avoid another lengthy abscence. So, I'm around. If you see a blue Civic driving down the roads of Montgomery, breifcase in the passenger seat, Beastie Boys in the CD player, that's me keepin it real.

"Life At The Ranch"

Sorry I didn't update last week, it was a hectic day with me driving 3-4 hours everyday. This next week won't be quite that bad. And by bad, I don't mean unenjoyable, I mean hectic. I'm still enjoying it.

Anyway, as some of you know, a couple of weeks ago I finished the editing of the documentary that we filmed before I moved out. This weekend brought the Screening and the World Premiere of the DVD, "Life At The Ranch." It was given good reviews and commanded applause from the first audience. Now, here it is for all the world to see. It's cut up into 3 parts due to YouTube's time restrictions. It's about 23 minutes total and the end seems to be everyone's favorite (including mine). So, enjoy and let us know what you think. If you wanna watch the DVD, which obviously is much better quality then you'll see here, other showings may be on the way.


Life At The Ranch: Part 1




Life At The Ranch: Part 2




Life At The Ranch: Part 3

The Scottish Uprising Will Not Be Televised

I went to a church this morning that is approximately 1.5 minutes from my apartment. I enjoyed it. An Aggie sat next to me, she was class of '02. After the service she (and her husband, and 3 other people) wanted to make sure I met the college pastor. They were all fully aware that I had graduated, but they thought that I should fellowship with people my own age. I'm not an old guy yet, there are plenty of '06ers that are still in school (and 'o5ers!). So I was invited to the college bible study tonight. In addition, he invited me to his Sunday School class next week. Now this is a small church, so his Sunday school class is not just college students. It a wide variety that streches from 7th Grade - College. A little too weird for me honestly... But I got my small loaf of bread and a cassette tape and came home.

At home, Kevin was getting some cable out of his Directv van. Apparently since he has that van in the parking lot and the complex uses Directv, the other tenants think that he works for the complex. Anyway, he had an easy job for a woman that approached him this morning, so he was readying a cable to take over there to her. As he was doing so, our Scottish neighbor walked over. He was ready to rant about Directv to Kevin. We'd talked earlier about how inconvenient it is that our apartment complex will only allow us to go through a specific provider for internet and phone and through Directv for cable. The fact that their company only offers slow internet irked me. Them not allowing an international call package irritated ol' Scotty who makes a lot of international calls. And the both of us agreed that the cable service they offer has its negetives. I like the channels we get, College Sports TV rocks my face. However, the fact that there is no guide on the screen and since we have a hodgepodge of stations, there's no guide online or in print that will help us out, we never know what is on any given station. Also, there's no box on our tv, so DVR is out of the question. Now those were the complaints that Scotty was ready to file with Kevin. As little tv as I watch, it hasn't been as huge of an ordeal for me. However, my Scottish friend exclaimed that the World Cup is coming up and since it's in Germany, the live broadcasts will be coming on early in the morning. Since Kevin could not help him, we suggested talking to the front office about it and I gave him a channel guide.
"If I am going to miss the World Cup, there will be a Scottish uprising over there," he said in his thick Scottish accent as he pointed to his apartment. "If you hear curse words being yelled in Scottish, you'll know where it's coming from."

So, while Germany has been taking extra precautions this year to help protect against hooliganism, they've forgot to secure Montgomery Trace apartments. Let's hope this is corrected by June 9th...

Confetti!

Chris' Tip of the Day:
The easiest way to make confetti? Leave a pamplet in the back pocket of your jeans when you wash them. When the spin cycle is done, it's like a little party in your washing machine. And stuck all over your clothes and towels... It's the easiest way, but realize that it is also the most inconvenient method...

Gettin Krunk

Just came in from playing ball in my parking lot. Not as easy as it has been. The parking lot down near my apartment is getting pretty crowded... My normal ball-playing spot was pretty convenient and quite accomadating, but now it's over.

Penny came and visited me this weekend, which I loved. We spent some time in The Woodlands and then in Conroe at the outlet mall. What do you do with a girl? Take her shopping is usually a pretty easy answer... Honestly, I needed some new clothes. Grownup clothes. And I got plenty. For dinner tonight, we ate at a nice little place here in Montgomery, the Heritage House Restraunt. It's the oldest restraunt in this historic city. It had good food, good service, and huge portions. I've learned that Montgomery is not short on good places to eat. My favorite part of the dining experience was the fact that our elderly waitress left the tea and water pitcher on our table so that she could easily fill people's glasses sitting near us. I opted to fill my own whenever I needed to. Penny's gone now, always the worst part of the visit... Kevin's coming up here tonight to bring a second load of stuff as he's finally moving in.

A little story from tonight. Penny's gone, I'm doing laundry, so I have some basketball shorts and a wife beater on, my music pumped up so I can dance around my house and get straight krunk. I push the load in the washing machine and head out to my car to get some shoes out of the back seat. As I walk out and close my door, I can still hear the beat bumpin inside my apartment. Just then, some people in the apartment across from me leave. It's my new neighbor's parents. I didn't know anyone was in there, I didn't expect to see anyone out there, I've been the only tenant in my entire building for the past 2 weeks, so seeing actual people was a surprise. The father looked at me with a slight scowl and said nothing. The mother faked a smile.
"Hi," I said, "Are y'all moving in there?"
"No," the woman replied. "Our daughter is moving in. Her friend will also be living there." The conversation abruptly ended.
Uncomfortable and overly aware of my appearance, I quickly said "I don't normally dress like this.." a little louder than I meant to. "I've been the only person here for two weeks so I didn't think anyone would be out here."
The woman nodded, flashed a quick smile and added, "That's the nice part about being by yourself." The man remained silent as he walked to his car and got in. The woman walked to the passenger's side. I shrugged, went to my car and then returned to my house for the rest of my dance party.

I asked for neighbors and now I got 'em. So far however, they've been a real inconvenience and apparently, they don't approve of the way I dress. They probably think I'm a young punk kid. I have a job! With a briefcase! And clients! Bah...so much for the first impression.

Mmm...Cheesecake

So, yeah it's 10PM and I'm just now getting home. It was a long day (which isn't necessarily bad). I got to hang out with the clients all day, learn some more stuff. It was all good. I got off work a little before 5, we had dinner in The Woodlands at 7, so there was no sense in me coming home between then, so I ran some errands and hung out at The Woodlands Mall. All kinds of interesting people in there. Somehow a group of 4 punks tried to have a quasi-thug look, but retaining their upper class preppiness all the while. They irritated me as they hung out between Banana Republic and Abercrombie, so I moved across the mall to another bench. Anyway, 7 rolled around and I got an abundance of good food, courtesy of my company at The Cheesecake Factory. We had so many appetizers, I filled up on that by the time my food came. And then was dessert. Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake is probably the best thing ever. It's even better than mashed potatoes. Anyway, as I was saying, a long day isn't necessarily bad. So far, all things have been good in Montgomery. I have been blessed with a job that I am liking and a nice little town to come home to. Of course I miss the comfort and friends College Station provides and the family in Corpus, but for now I can call Montgomery "home."

I bought the Lecrae album today in The Woodlands, I've listened to a couple of songs off of it, I was on the phone most of my driving time tonight. But as we already know, it was straight krunk.

Another thing that I think is awesome is a new CD of lullabies. These lullabies are put out by some company (Rock-A-Bye Records Maybe?) to soothe your child, you know typical lullaby stuff. The awesome part: they do it by toning down rock artists. Right now, they've released their first 5 (or so) records, including Metallica of course. Maybe that's something even I could fall asleep to.

And lastly, it's June 1st, which of course is the first day of Hurricane Season. Always an exciting time as we coastal people know. Happy Hunting.